I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
