Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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