can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
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