The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
