Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
