I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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