He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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