wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
This house was built for laser tag.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
