No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
