what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
he laminated a picture of his dick.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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