Christians are straight up FREAKS
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize
