Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
