are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
