hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
