Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
