hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
