I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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