walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
