I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
