Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize