I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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