YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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