Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
no, he came in my armpit
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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