No, drunk sperm still make babies.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize