i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Randomize
