Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
