It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
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