I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
