Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
