My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
My life is pants optional.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize