remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
i just google imaged poop.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
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