"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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