"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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