I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
