I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
