so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
