I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
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