OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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