Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Randomize
