I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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