party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
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