I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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