So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
