Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
