i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
