what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
