There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
