Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
