i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
