I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
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